South B

   It was midmorning as I walked into the South B. slum. Burning plastic and raw sewage filled my nostrils making my stomach churn. Stepping over crippled dogs and piles of garbage, I made my way to the church all the while clutching my dad’s hand tightly. Brown eyes and foreign whispers followed us. As we ducked into the church, I realized it wasn’t a church by American standards at all. All it was, was a dirt floor, a window and two rickety poles holding up the roof.
    I went straight to the back of the building to be with the kids. For nearly four hours I got swarmed by malnourished children who were all trying to get a look into my blue eyes. Five pairs of sticky, dirty hands ran through my soft hair, pulling and braiding. Fingers touched every square inch of my face and I am convinced that that is the source of the cold I have been fighting ever since.
     A shy girl sat in the corner with a cookie, breaking off the tiniest bits and giving them to the other children. A boy sat next to me the entire time, occasionally licking a rock. I always had at least one body on my lap ranging from a month old to a solid 8 years of age. One little girl looked at me with more admiration in her eyes than anyone I have ever seen. Another girl, while sitting on my lap, went to the bathroom all over.
     These are such vivid memories that I will cherish. Why were these children so happy? They didn’t own a pair of shoes and yet, they had more joy and excitement than some of the richest families I know. I got to thinking about how different our lives are. These kids have never touched grass, have never had a candlelight dinner. They have never enjoyed the pleasure of a hot bath. And most if not all of them will stay in the slums for the rest of their precious lives.
      This puts into perspective all my problems and makes them seem petty and insignificant. I have in my life. I have been given so much, too much in fact, to keep it all. Right then and there I knew that being with children like this is what I am meant to do. Living in the same conditions sounds hard and seemingly impossible but my heart has never swelled up so much and I have never been so content as when I had those treasures sitting on my lap. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about each one of those kids and I can’t wait until I’m reunited with them.

The river that is used to bathe, wash clothes, pee in, and drink...

entrance to the slum

Goals.

Rain in the summer is like getting sick on a Saturday...pointless. Summer is drifting by so swiftly! I decided to make goals for these three (restful) months that I'm not in school. Some of them have been easy habits to start, while others I struggle with everyday.


1. Cook and experiment in the kitchen.

I have really found a love and fiery passion for cooking! Not just grilling chicken or icing a cake but setting the atmosphere! Therefore, whenever I cook there are ALWAYS candles burning, music playing, and when I can, fresh picked flowers adorning the table. I find it has an art and love to bless my guests and my family!

I made a spontaneous feast for my dear friend!

2. Read an increasingly growing stack of books!

Starting from top

"Compelled by Love" by  Heidi Bakker (one of my hero's)

"Too Small to Ignore" by Dr. Wess Stafford

"What is the What" by Dave Eggers

"Fully Devoted" by John Ortberg, Laurie Pederson, and Judson Poling

"Onward" by Howard Schultz (that's how much I love my job)

"My forbidden face" by Latifa

"The Lunatic Express" by Carl Hoffman

"Till we have faces" by C.S. Lewis

"Jane Eyre" by Charlotte Bronte

"French Women Don't Get Fat" by Mireille Guiliano

3. Being diligent in my devotions and spending time conversing with the Lord.

I had read the fascinating and thought provoking book "The Jesus I Never Knew" by Philip Yancy and it made me see Him in a whole new way! My relationship with my Savior grew so much over this summer and made me want to change and become more like Him.

4.Getting a job!

 I not only got a job, I got my DREAM job! I am a Starbucks barista baby! I love this job more than anything and I never want to leave work! I have definitely been forced to go out of my comfort zone but I'm starting to build relationships with customers and passionately pour steaming espresso into foamy latte's!

4. Developing godly character!

I have had some rough times this summer but I know God is answering my prayers to be stretched and to grow! I am learning to thank Him for everything and ever since I have been doing that I have been overwhelmingly content!!

People Watching

Going to a Starbucks with a book is one my guilty pleasures. I can stay within those four walls for hours and hours and yet my book is rarely gets noticed. Why, you might ask? Because people grab my attention more than anything. I love people watching. (especially in Portland) Whether they're in a hurry, savoring that delicious soy Amerciano, or meeting with a long lost friend, I love making up scenerio's of what they might be going through in my head. But what are they going through? Have you ever thought what the stranger on the bus or ahead in the line has been through? Pondering this makes me want to do random acts of kindness to strangers. Whether it's picking up the glove they dropped as they walk by or having patience if they don't drive nearly as fast as you.
So your challenge this week is to perform random acts of kindness to strangers you see. You could pay for somebody's latte, or have them go ahead of you in the Safeway line. You will be left feeling satisfied and fufilled.

My top 10 favorite movies!

 1.Anne of Green Gables!
This has been my #1 favorite movie since my Grandparents gave it to me on my 4th birthday. I must say, I think this movie formed my personality minus the red hair. I have such a powerful imagination and have always dreamed of being a writer. I also have the most romantic ideas and have very high expectations of my tall, irresistibly handsome future husband!

I had this on VHS and I would rewind the kissing scene
over and over again until the video was all fuzzy from overuse!

2. Pride and Prejudice (THE OLD 6 HOUR VERSION ONE.)
This is pretty close to my #1 movie. Mr. Darcy (Colin Firth) was my first crush and I am still madly in love with him. He is just...so wonderful. I just love this story so much. It never gets old. If you have never seen this version than, quite frankly, I don't know how you are still living. It is truly the greatest. Lizzie is my heroine of all literature.

I personally think she is the most
beautiful woman in the world

My future husband! Look at his face!

3. Jane Eyre
This is one of my favorite books of all time and the movie just seals the deal. I love how the characters get more attractive, the more you get to know them. There are so many twists and turns in the plot! During the movie, I'm either crying or laughing.

4. The Count of Monte Cristo

This movie is one of those I-have-to-see-it-once-a-month-or-I-will-explode kind of movies. It is wonderful! Such a clever story and once again, I've fallen in love with the main character! This is also an intense movie and one that isn't boring!

4. Chocolat
I HAVE to eat chocolate when I watch this movie. This is also a once-a-month type of movie. It inspires me to be myself and not go with what everyone else is doing.

6. Dan in Real Life
This movie is hilarious, sweet, and will pull at your heart strings. Plus it has Steve Carell which makes it doubly awesome! Its a good movie when you have nothing going on!

7. How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
I love chick-flicks as much as the next girl, but growing up with two older brothers and a mom and dad who loves intense war films I was sadly deprived of this lovey dovey world. I just love this movie so much. It is so funny and charming.

8. Italian Job
I love highly intense movies. Oceans 11 and the Bournes are all up on my list but Italian Job is, for me, better than all of them. I love the strategies and planning and teamwork that's involved with this movie.

9. The Phantom of the Opera
As I write this blog entry I'm watching this movie. It is so priceless. I saw this on the London stage and it was magical. My dream is to be in this play as Christine. I'm so infatuated with this movie. In fact, I've probably seen this movie more than any of the others.

My Dream wedding dress

I actually made this scene in my ceramics class.

10. Breakfast at Tiffany's
Audrey Hepburn will forever be my favorite actress. My room has many framed pictures of her and I just wish I had half her style. Breakfast at Tiffany's is....strange but a classic. When I get older I know I'll be "crazy about Tiffany's"

Someday, Im gonna dress just like her.

background of my computer. Greatest kiss of all time

Most stressful situation I have ever experienced.

Today we took my mom and dad to the airport. They are leaving for Kenya for two weeks. As we get to the gate my dad realizes we have the wrong passports. Now keep in mind we live about an hour and a half  from the airport and for international flights you need to be ON THE PLANE an hour before it leaves. It was 4:15 and they were closing the gates at 4:45. We called my brother who lives 25 minutes from our house to get the passports and come to the airport. We compromised with them, and they said they could hold the boarding of the plane till 5:05. That was the most stressed out Ive ever seen any family.The only thing that was remotely fun was that my mom and dad were at the check out counter, my brother was outside, waiting for my other brother to drive up with the passport so that he could just run in with it, and I was holding a spot in the long security line. I felt like we were "Ocean's 5" or "The Bourne Myers..." My brother drove 80 mph the whole way (I hope no cops are reading this) and somehow, by God's grace made it to the airport by 5:08. They still let my parents on despite the 3 minutes. I don't think Ive ever prayed so forcefully in my life. And WOW! God answered a seemingly impossible request. Thank you Lord. Now Im just praying for a safe flight to Amsterdam...and then to Kenya!

Do not be anxious about anything.

Tomorrow my parents are leaving for Africa. They have been given so many wonderful opportunities to travel and share they're faith. For the best 6 or so years my dad has been going to various places in South America, the Middle East, and Africa, to train pastors who haven't had proper educations. So tomorrow will be the first day of two whole weeks of their absence in America.

Every single time my dad leaves the country something bad happens. There have been deaths, car accidents, major illness's...the list goes on and on. So naturally I have great fear whenever he leaves and usually I get mini panic attacks. But lately Ive been really preparing myself. Philippians 4:6-7 says:

Do not be anxious about anything but in everything, by prayer and petition,

with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God,

 which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds

 in Christ Jesus.

I have had months go by where I've been paralyzed by fear and that is not how our lives are intended to live.

Psalm 27:1-3 says:

The Lord is my light and my salvation-whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the stronghold of my life-of whom shall I be afraid?

When evil men advance against me to devour my flesh,

When my enemies and my foes attack me they will stumble and fall

Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear,

Though war break out against me even then will I be confident

I do ask one thing of you. Please keep my mom and dad in your prayers. Pray for their safety in the dangerous parts of Kenya and through all transportation. And please pray for me. Pray that I wouldn't be anxious and that I would trust in the Lord. Thank you!

What is a gentlemen?

We have all read about gentlemen; seen "unrealistically perfect" men who pursue the protagonist in romantic movies. But does he really exist? Is there someone that I would ever be so fortuante to fall desperately in love with?




Mr. Darcy=my #1 crush since I was 5 years old!



What exactly is a gentleman?

• Trustworthy and Loyal! He doesn't lead any other girls on

• Genuine-he is completely 100% himself in every circumstance he is in

William Wallace from Braveheart...now there's a man

• Selfless-he wants whats best for you, even if it may affect him in a not-so-positive way

• Has the fruits of the Spirit-which are Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-control

Gilbert from Anne of Green Gables

• Humble and Teachable- doesn't act like he knows everything and is willing to learn from his mistakes

• Determined and Persistant-He doesn't quit doing something just because it is hard

• Compassionate- has a sensitive heart to those in need and takes action to help them

• Passionate- in what he does for work and the way he lives his life

When I think of all these attributes, I for one, don't want to settle for anything less. I deserve someone who has all these characteristics. And if I do find a gentleman, what kind of woman would HE deserve? Thats what my job is to do right now, in highschool; building character, good habits, and being the kind of woman God wants me to be. And hopefully my Mr. Darcy will come for me!!!!!






And the best gentleman I know! If I could have my
future husband model after anyone it would
be my Dad!

My Burning Passion for Coffee

Did you know that coffee has been around for over than 1,500 years?!? Have you ever thought of how people discovered the beverage? Imagine yourself on the high Ethiopian planes where coffee first grew. Lightning strikes a tree filled with coffee cherries. A rich, smoky perfume rises from the burning shrub and grabs your attention. Or maybe you've plucked some of those ripe, red cherries to enjoy their tantalizing sweet pulp, then tossed the seeds into a campfire. You can't believe the aroma that bursts forth!

    Ive been drinking black coffee ever since I was two years old (In Africa they would give the mothers coffee with cream and suger and the kids black bitter coffee) I have a cup every morning at breakfast and every night after dinner!
     

But my favorite part of the beverage, even more than the flavor, is the social aspect of it! I go out for coffee with my friends at least once a week. I love the talk that comes with it! I also love sitting around my living room with company or family and talking and laughing with a mug in my hand!


I also LOVE snuggling up with a blanket, a great book, and a strong cup of coffee!


















I pretty much spend all my money on Starbucks (not totally proud of that fact) Its my favorite place ever!

I went to Seattle for 4 days and drank a starbucks for
my meals, and then some!

As I ate my crème brulee with a strong Americano, on the plane, heading back to America, I pondered my life over the last month! Four new countries that thoroughly changed my life. Doing what I had just done was a dream-an item on my bucket list! But going first class-that was indescribable!

A doctor in our church, who turned out to be our travel companion, offered to pay for my family to travel first class to London. That was the most comfortable 13 hours of my life. From over 50 movies to choose to the chairs reclining into beds to the lobster and steak served to us…it was like a dream! I didn’t want to get off.
But as soon as I felt the 4 degree chill creep up my face. I knew this was the place for me. We retired to the “First class lounge” where we took showers, got massages, had a choice to read Newspapers from at least 25 different countries, and helped ourselves to every style of food imaginable!




As I got off the subway, all bundled up, I was surprised at how diverse and beautiful everyone was. Everyone had poise and sophistication! There were many occasions that I stared back at a stranger walking by.

We had our share of European food and shopping in boutiques but we got to do something that I never thought I would ever be able to say! I saw the ‘Phantom of the Opera’ in Her Majesty’s Theatre! Dressed up and ready to go, I walked hand in hand with my Dad down the busy street, anticipation and anxiety gripping at my gut. Throughout my most cherished play, I was crying, laughing, and gazing at the glowing stage in wonder.






My last day in London I got to ride a train, with a Starbucks in my hand, while it was snowing! All things I love! I may not remember a lot of the details about those three days but I sure will never forget what I felt. Truly Blessed!

One year ago I was in Africa

One year ago, we had just landed in Nairobi, Kenya feeling excited, nervous, and in awe that we were actually there. So much has happened since then. I remember leaving Africa a different person and its stuck with me this whole year. I STILL to this day don't take toilets for granted. But more importantly, I am a lot more conscientious of the world surrounding me.


So here is a journal entry from when I stayed in Doro, Sudan. Note: it is a liiitttle bit dramatic but that just adds flavoring.

"The sun burns hotter. The days longer. As a day goes by it feels like a week. Its hard to believe that we have only spent two days here. I am still sick but was able to go into the village for the first time. I wasn't able to try the 'boon' (coffee) because of my stomach. The villagers just stare as I walk by. They rarely, if at all, see a white skinned, blond haired, blue eyed, person.


The village consists of huts, pigs, goats, dust, and that's pretty much it. There was this baby named Dr. Rob who was sleeping on a blanket surrounded by pigs. Everyone is so poor and dirty here. I look at the church and hospital that have dozens of bullet holes from years of war and I see the black fields that were burned by vicious soldiers and this is as close to hell as I have ever seen. It tears my heart to see girls my age who don't have families. Who have to worry about survival. Then I think about how stupidly selfish I am ALL the time. I have gone through nothing compared to these people. I am so glad I am having this experience because it shows me that many people are hurting out there. And it motivates me to do something about it. I want to spend my life helping and reaching out to these people. Living among them, teaching them, showing them Christ's love."


I want to go back to Africa more than anything. But in the meantime God is giving me opportunities to share my faith right where I'm at. I cannot wait to see how the Lord is gonna use me this upcoming year. Even though I'm still in high school the possibilities are endless. All I can say is BRING IT ON!

The huts we stayed in



                   The bucket shower                    



I was petrified to take a shower in this thing especially when I saw a rat scurry across the ground. But by the end of the week I lived for this shower because it meant three minutes of relief from the 110 degree weather and the ONLY time I got to myself...literally. It was a lot of work to actually take a shower as well!

     

My brother just married my best friend on December 29, 2010! It was an amazing wedding and I'll write more about it when I get the pictures. Being with people who were older made me feel kind of discontent with where I am right now in high school. I feel like I should be in college or, as every seems to be doing, engaged! But I don't want to live my life like that. I want to be content with where I am right now and to have Jesus romance me. So I spent a long time just praying about it.

The next day I went to the beach and was utterly amazed! God had answered my prayer the previous night and was romancing me. He painted me the most beautiful sunset and it was like a sweet kiss from Him. For the first time, really since I can remember, I was so content to be alone. I wasn't imagining someone elses arms around me sharing in on the moment. I was content having it be just me and the Lord. That felt amazing! I am just in awe of how soon God had answered my prayer for having him pursue me. I was to the point of tears. That night I was sitting by the roaring fire, sipping my Teavanna tea and listening to "Romantic Movie Love Themes" and it felt amazing to have that much peace.

My favorite quote sums up what I feel:

"What are your favorite things? Are they the first snows of the year, the fragrance of the air after a summer rain, curling up with a great book after a tiring day? These are all whispers from the Lord, notes sent to awaken your hearts longing.
Every song you love, every memory you cherish, every moment that has moved you to holy tears has been given to you by the one who has been pursuing you from your first breath in order to win your heart. Gods version of chocolates and flowers and candlelight dinners come in the form of sunsets, falling stars, moonlight on lakes and cricket symphonies; warm wind, swaying trees, lush gardens and fierce devotion."

-Captivating

The sunset that God made just for me. Really, this
picture doesn't do it justice.